Oh, to be a bright-eyed, bushy tailed freshman again, enjoying the new found freedom and embracing the do-whatever-I-want attitude. Yeah, we’ve all been there. School is back in full throttle and The College has a new pool of freshies ready to dive into the, as we all call it, “ultimate college experience.” Freshman who are reading this, you are probably wondering how everyone knows you are a freshman, am I right? Bless your hearts, you may as well write in bold on your forehead “freshman.” However, don’t fret! Here is an honest and concise list of the don’ts that you DO. Also, this may or may not be inspired by a certain section on Yik Yak.
- Wearing your lanyard and ID all the time. Classic freshman move.
- Decking yourself out in college-themed everything. Did you raid the entire clothing stock at the book store or something?
- Thinking that the jungle juice at a frat party wasn’t that strong. Or that it’s okay to drink it out of a big trash can. They washed it right?
- Sporting your drawstring backpack on the weekends that you got for free at orientation. We all know you’re toting your alcohol in there.
- Talking about what happened in high school. Trust me, it’s time to move on.
- Ranting on about how drunk you were last night before class starts. Just stop. The sunglasses are enough.
- Expressing your love for an upperclassman and how he will wait for you. LOL.
- Locking yourself out of your dorm room. I can’t help ya there. That’s all you.
- Using your meal plan. I have heard too many “is this real?” and “I’m still hungry” in the cafeteria.
- Buying all the books for your classes. Well, there went roughly an extra $300 you could have used on alcohol.
- Displaying empty alcoholic bottles in your dorm room. Simply because you want to hold onto memories that you actually don’t remember.
- Asking where a building is. It will take less than a week for you to learn the campus. It’s maybe a total of three streets.
- Raising your hand in class to ask to use the restroom. That is a double whammy! Best way to tick your professor off and let the whole class know you’re a freshman.
- Traveling in packs. Youths, you’ll buck up the courage to walk alone one day.
Hopefully, these facts weren’t too degrading because as mentioned before, it is a part of the “ultimate college experience” and we’ve all done them. Now you have a little insight on how and why rando’s scream “FRESHMAN!” and throw beer cans at you. But, don’t let that deter you from having the best year of your life. Embrace the freshie status and accept the taunting. So freshman, how bout’ it and continue to humor us upperclassman some more, eh?